Vow renewal invitations: wording, timing and etiquette
Who hosts a vow renewal, who to invite, when to send invitations, whether gifts are appropriate, and wording for a formal ceremony or a relaxed party.
The short version
- A vow renewal is hosted by the couple, or by their children. Invitations go out six to eight weeks ahead.
- Invite the people who matter to your marriage now, not the original guest list.
- Say plainly that no gifts are expected; a line about the years together is enough.
- Wording can be as formal or relaxed as the day, but it should say whose vows and how many years.
A vow renewal invitation goes out six to eight weeks before the ceremony, names the couple and the occasion (often an anniversary), and is usually sent by the couple themselves or by their children. Etiquette is lighter than for a wedding: there is no wedding party to arrange, no registry, and the guest list is simply the people who matter to the marriage today.
Who hosts a vow renewal?
Most often the couple. Grown children sometimes host it as a surprise or a gift, which the invitation can say. The ceremony can be led by an officiant, a religious leader, a friend or one of the children; it has no legal effect, so anyone can do it.
Who should be invited?
The people in your life now: children and grandchildren, close friends, family. There is no obligation to invite everyone from the original wedding, and no reason to invite people you have lost touch with because they were there twenty-five years ago.
Are gifts appropriate?
Usually not expected. Many couples write "no gifts, please, your company is the gift" or suggest a donation to a charity they care about. Anniversary gifts from close family are welcome but should never be asked for.
Vow renewal wording you can use
Together with their children, Margaret and Robert Hale invite you to celebrate twenty-five years of marriage as they renew their vows. Saturday, September 18, at four o'clock, St. Mark's Garden, Hudson. Reception to follow. Kindly reply by August 20.
Ten years, two kids and one very patient dog later, we'd like to say it all again. Join us as we renew our vows, Saturday, September 18, 4 PM, in our garden. Dinner and dancing after. No gifts, just you. Priya and Arjun
Our parents said "I do" fifty years ago. Please join us as they say it again. Saturday, September 18, 3 PM, The Old Mill. Hosted by their children.
Should the invitation be printed or digital?
Either, and the guests decide. Older guests may treasure a printed card; everyone else benefits from a link with a map and a reply button. Many couples send both: a small printed run for the oldest relatives and a digital invitation for everyone, so the replies arrive in one list.
A wedding asks people to believe in a promise. A vow renewal shows them it was kept.
Common questions
Who hosts a vow renewal?
Usually the couple themselves. Grown children sometimes host it, and the invitation can say so.
When should vow renewal invitations be sent?
Six to eight weeks before the ceremony, or earlier if guests need to travel.
Do you bring a gift to a vow renewal?
Gifts are usually not expected. Many couples ask for no gifts or suggest a donation to a charity instead.
Invitations for every part of the celebration
The wedding invitation for everyone, smaller invitations for the evening before or the morning after, and invitations designed to order for every other occasion.
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