Jewish wedding traditions, explained for guests and couples
The chuppah, the ketubah, the veiling, circling, the seven blessings, breaking the glass and the hora: what each tradition means and how couples adapt them.
The short version
- A Jewish wedding usually takes place under a chuppah, a canopy that stands for the home the couple will build.
- The ketubah is the marriage contract, often a work of art the couple hang at home.
- The ceremony ends with breaking a glass, and guests shout "Mazel tov!"
- Practice varies widely between Orthodox, Conservative, Reform and secular families; follow your rabbi and your family.
A Jewish wedding is rich in rituals that each carry a meaning: the couple stand under a canopy (the chuppah), sign a marriage contract (the ketubah), share wine over blessings, and end the ceremony by breaking a glass. How many of these a couple include, and how, varies a great deal between Orthodox, Conservative, Reform and secular families, so treat what follows as common practice and let your rabbi and your families guide the details.
Before the ceremony
- The ketubah signing: the marriage contract is signed by witnesses, often in a small gathering before the ceremony
- The bedeken (veiling): in many traditions the groom lowers the veil over the bride's face before the ceremony
- Some couples do not see each other for a period before the wedding, which makes the bedeken the first meeting of the day
Under the chuppah
- The chuppah: a canopy, open on all sides, standing for the home the couple will build and its open welcome
- Circling: in many traditions the bride circles the groom, often seven times; many modern couples circle each other
- Blessings over wine, which the couple share
- The ring: traditionally a plain band given to the bride; many couples now exchange rings
- The reading of the ketubah
- The seven blessings (sheva brachot), recited by the rabbi or by honored guests
- Breaking the glass: the ceremony ends as a glass is broken underfoot, and guests shout "Mazel tov!"
After the ceremony
- Yichud: a few minutes the couple spend alone together straight after the ceremony
- The hora: a circle dance in which the couple are often lifted on chairs
- Blessings over bread before the meal, and the seven blessings again at the end of it in many families
What should guests know?
Dress codes vary: at more observant weddings, modest dress is expected and men may be asked to wear a kippah (usually provided). Many weddings do not take place on the Sabbath or on certain holidays, which is why Sunday weddings and Saturday-night weddings are common. If you are a guest and unsure, ask the couple; they will be glad you did.
Interfaith and modern weddings
Many interfaith and secular couples keep the traditions that matter most to them, often the chuppah, the ketubah and the breaking of the glass, and explain them to guests in a program or on a sign. Some ask a family member to make or hold the chuppah, which makes it personal. If your invitation goes to guests from different backgrounds, one line explaining a tradition helps everyone feel part of it.
A canopy open on all sides is a lovely picture of a marriage: a shelter, with the doors always open to the people you love.
Common questions
What is a chuppah?
A canopy under which the couple stand during a Jewish wedding ceremony. It is open on all sides and stands for the home the couple will build together.
What is a ketubah?
The Jewish marriage contract, signed by witnesses, usually before the ceremony. Many couples choose a decorated ketubah and hang it in their home.
Why do they break a glass at a Jewish wedding?
Breaking the glass ends the ceremony and has several traditional meanings, often explained as a reminder of the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem and of the fragility of life amid joy. Guests respond with "Mazel tov!"
What should guests wear to a Jewish wedding?
It depends on the community. At more observant weddings, modest dress is expected and men may be asked to wear a kippah. When unsure, ask the couple.
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