Wedding ceremony order: processional to recessional

A wedding ceremony has three parts: the processional, when everyone walks in; the ceremony itself, from the welcome to the kiss; and the recessional, when everyone walks out. The order below is the one most common at Western civil and Christian weddings, with the main variations noted. Religious ceremonies have their own orders, and your officiant is the authority on those.

What is the order of the processional?

• Grandparents and parents are seated (sometimes escorted down the aisle)
• The officiant takes their place at the front
• One partner enters, alone or with their attendants, or is already waiting at the front
• The attendants walk in, usually in pairs or one by one, with the maid or man of honor last
• The ring bearer and flower girl
• The other partner, with a parent, both parents, another escort, or alone

In Jewish tradition both partners are often escorted by both parents, and the order of the wedding party differs. At many same-sex and modern weddings, both partners walk in, one after the other or together. There is no wrong choice, only an unrehearsed one.

What is the order of the ceremony itself?

• The welcome and opening words from the officiant
• Readings, a song or a story about the couple
• The declaration of intent ("Do you take...")
• The vows, traditional or written by the couple
• The exchange of rings
• The pronouncement, and the kiss
• In many places, the signing of the register or license, before or after the recessional

A civil or non-religious ceremony usually takes twenty to thirty minutes; a religious one can take an hour or more. Long enough to mean something, short enough that nobody in the back row starts checking the time.

What is the order of the recessional?

The processional in reverse: the couple first, then the child attendants, the wedding party in pairs, then parents and grandparents. The officiant often leaves last or steps aside. Ask guests to stay seated until the family has left, and have someone direct them to the drinks.

How do you adapt it to your family?

• Divorced parents: both can walk with you, or one walks and the other gives a reading
• No parent to walk with: walk alone, with a sibling, a grandparent, a child or a friend
• Children of your own: they can walk in with you, carry the rings or stand beside you
• A large wedding party: have them already standing at the front, so the processional takes two minutes, not ten

Should the ceremony order be on the invitation?

No. Guests need the start time and the place; the detailed order belongs in a printed program, on a sign, or in the run sheet for your wedding party. What helps guests is a clear schedule on the invitation: when to arrive, when the ceremony starts, when the reception begins.

Rehearse the walk once, with the music. It is the part everyone watches and nobody has practiced.